Saturday, July 31, 2010

the list.

it is my birthday in less than 25 days.
it's daunting.
older.
wiser? 
ha.

i might not exactly want all of these/ get all of these for my birthday,
i want them nevertheless.

theory dress, reduced from 400 to 200 dollars. (:



-victoria's secret garden, perfume.


- canon eos 5D.


- haha yes, snow tigers. (:


- pretty little ornaments in my hair, as it is pulled up in a mad bun. =D



-  the most beautiful, simple cake.



-13 inch, macbook pro.




it's 2:07 am.
quite tired. my eyes are droopy. i'm watching how i met your mother. it's hi-larious. 
more to come.


Saturday, July 24, 2010

''god left this place a long time ago''.

blood diamond- a blend of fact and fiction.
civil war. terror. bloodshed.

for school, my assessment task was to write a speech for module C, which deals with the ways composers represent real events through the influence of their social and historical context.
we had to choose and analyse a film and compare it with United 93, and evaluate the veracity (truthfulness) and techniques used by the composers in filming their version of historical events.

it may be a bit tacky and unstructured, however,
this is my version;

‘’The world wants what we have and we- have it cheap’’

In the film, Blood Diamond, directed by Edward Zwick, the title and quote refers to blood diamonds mined in African war zones and sold to finance insurgency and thereby profit diamond companies across the world. 

The movie is inspired by the true story of how the illegal sale of smuggled diamonds helped fuel the civil war in Sierra Leone. In contrast, United 93 is inspired by the September 11th attacks focusing on that specific event and its timeframe of nearly two hours, as opposed to Blood diamond’s more fictitious plot of a few weeks.

The film contains many references to bloodshed in the manner of quotes, disturbing visuals and the motif of bloodstained diamonds to demonstrate how the world is corrupt and interconnected, assisting in the exploitation of developing countries and human labour, “they're not financing the war, but they're providing a means to keep it going”. These references provide veracity of the harsh conditions and a sad visual essay of suffering.

By casting well known actors such as Djimon Hounsou, Jennifer Connelly and Leonardo Di Caprio, who plays the lead role as Danny Archer, the director has sensationalised the movie for it to appeal to a wider audience adding to the film's entertainment value. By filming on location, the attention to detail used to for the plot and characters, assists in developing the verisimilitude. Language and military jargon in both films such as the native African language and the military jargon in the control centres contribute to the veracity.

The actors cast in 'Blood Diamond' contrast to those in 'United 93', as Zwick cast award-winning actors to ensure the quality, whereas Paul Greengrass used unknown actors to portray the passengers, to establish authenticity and to emphasise that the heroic acts were done by ordinary people, keeping the focus on the actions rather than the actors. This is a more realistic approach to the event allowing the emotional connection between the characters and the audience to escalate.

 

Solomon, played by Djimon, is a fisherman who is enslaved by the RUF (revolutionary united front). His family is torn from him and Dia, his son, is taken as a child soldier. The issues of poverty, refugee camps and child soldiers are addressed very clearly through the events surrounding his family.

The RUF prefer children because it is so much simpler than indoctrinating grown men who have a strong hold on what is right and wrong. Through an emotionally deprived environment and the use of hard drugs and alcohol, children are tricked into thinking it is right to murder their own people. As a result, they are dehumanized. Subsequently Dia yells 'Enemy, enemy!'  at the sight of his father. Although their father-son relationship is re-established, in reality, it is not as easy to overcome such brainwashing.

 

Various camera techniques and angles are used to present the fictional account of the historical event. The scene where Danny and Solomon are fleeing an attacked village, is filmed using tracking shots to follow the pair's critical and chaotic escape. Non-diagetic music is used to cultivate suspense and serve the movies purpose as a political thriller. It is during the numerous war scenes that African tribal music is included, normally consisting of deep, low drums accompanying images of people fleeing as RUF trucks head towards villages to destroy them. Danny and Solomon escape onto a barren road with the government troops on one side and the RUF on the other.

This represents the battle between 'good and evil', and how the people of Sierra Leone are caught directly in the middle, the ones who ultimately suffer the consequences. This idea is similarly captured in the United 93 flight scenes. Danny and Solomon flee but it is amidst all the smoke from the bombs and gun powder that a mid long shot shows the silhouettes of the government soldiers kneeling and raising their hands in surrender.

A similar scene is portrayed in 'United 93' when the terrorists first attack and announce their presence. A second skin camera placement is used to effectively show the chaos. Tilt shots help to create a sense of panic and terror. Unlike 'Blood Diamond', the majority of 'United 93' is filmed from one location; the plane. This adds to the verisimilitude by attempting to appropriately recreate the events which occurred on the flight. The passengers are confined and trapped within the aircraft, unable to escape the acts of terrorism, which is juxtaposed to the war zones that Danny and Solomon escape from.

Blood Diamond successfully achieves a fictional account, rather than a broad true story or a documentary.  The film is focused on one victim, one diamond smuggler, one journalist and one child soldier.  By deriving from the truth and emphasizing on one adventure it parallels to United 93, which focuses on one event. Blood diamond’s reference to America, shows its cultural differences as do the opening scenes of United 93, establishing American culture and the cultural gap.

‘’In America, it's bling bling. But out here it's bling- bang.’’

Monday, July 19, 2010

neurotic.

head-fuck: a person/object who/which spends all hours toying with others' minds.

so..
why toy with people's minds. is it going to personally achieve anything-
satisfaction or pleasure?
why make yourself out to be a completely complex creature when in all honesty, you know you're transparent.
there's nothing to you. you're a window pane.

why create a web and tangle yourself in it, why live by the word's of others, why make yourself a replica of society's entertainment sources.

i've come to realise-
when we hear a song, watch a movie, watch a show-
we find resemblances to our characters and our lives and find satisfaction in keeping to that image and the story.
we become puppets of someone-else's design, and dispose of our own reality, and leave ourselves behind..
why tangle yourself in that web of lies.

it's a game- you and i both know.
maybe your actions are unintentional, but it's not the intention, it's the interpretation.
maybe it's normal to you.
maybe you're creating a trail, completely unaware.
maybe i'm rambling- seeing a scenario, building the tension in a harmless situation.
maybe i'm wishing for something that's not there.

i wish you would stop pretending.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

do you like the way it hurts.

photography- it's my passion.
when i take a photo,  i want to demonstrate, express, create.
even though these aren't my photos,
they express reality, different from ours, yet the same.
''just gonna stand there and watch me burn.. 
but that's alright because I like the way it hurts.
just gonna stand there
and hear me cry,
but that's alright because i love the way you lie, love the way you lie.

i can't tell you what it really is
i can only tell you what it feels like
and right now there's a steel knife
in my windpipe, i can't breathe
but I still fight
while I can fight
as long as the wrong feels right
it's like I'm in flight
high of a love
drunk from the hate
it's like I'm huffing paint
and I love it the more that I suffer
i suffocate.
and right before im about to drown
she resuscitates me
she fucking hates me
and I love it
wait
where you going
i'm leaving you
no you ain't
come back
we're running right back
here we go again
it's so insane
cause when it's going good
it's going great
i'm superman with the wind in his bag
she's lois lane
but when it's bad
it's awful
i feel so ashamed

i snap
who's that dude
i don't even know his name
i laid hands on her
i'll never stoop so low again
i guess i don't know my own strength
you ever love somebody so much
you can barely breathe
when you're with them
you meet, and neither one of you
even know what hit 'em
got that warm fuzzy feeling
yeah them chills

used to get 'em
now you're getting fucking sick

of looking at 'em
you swore you've never hit 'em
never do nothing to hurt 'em
now you're in each other's face
spewing venom
and these words
when you spit 'em
you push
pull each other's hair
scratch, claw, bit 'em
throw 'em down
pin 'em
so lost in the moments
when you're in 'em
it's the rage that took over

it controls you both
so they say it's best
to go your separate ways
guess that they don't know ya
cause today
that was yesterday
yesterday is over
it's a different day
sound like broken records
playin' over
but you promised her
next time you'll show restraint
you don't get another chance
life is no Nintendo game
but you lied again
now you get to watch her leave
out the window
guess that's why they call it window pane.

now I know we said things
did things
that we didn't mean
and we fall back
into the same patterns
same routine
but your temper's just as bad
as mine is
you're the same as me
but when it comes to love
you're just as blinded
baby please come back
it wasn't you
baby it was me
maybe our relationship
isn't as crazy as it seems
maybe that's what happens
when a tornado meets a volcano
all I know is
i love you too much
to walk away though
come inside
pick up your bags off the sidewalk
don't you hear sincerity
in my voice when I talk
told you this is my fault
look me in the eyeball
next time I'm pissed
i'll aim my fist
at the dry wall
next time
there will be no next time
i apologize
even though I know it's lies
i'm tired of the games
i just want her back
i know I'm a liar
if she ever tries to fucking leave again
i'mma tie her to the bed
and set the house on fire..''

Monday, July 5, 2010

familia.



''you said it once.
said it twice.
said it hurts,
but i'll do it again.

i don't change, i don't learn, cause i can't let it in..
i pull and you push and we cry, 
until we laugh again.
so i'm thinking maybe.
you've made up your mind.
cause you're distant
and i can't stand to fight anymore. ''

if ever words like that appear before them, people assume it's a romance gone wrong.
but for me, at this moment.
it's between my family.

i admit it. i am;
temperamental.
i have issues.
and i'm never afraid to hold back, when it comes to my family.
they know me better than anyone else.
i can't be calm and collected when they're with me.
we fight. we argue. it drives me insane.

it's hard for me to show affection, it truly is.
and they suffer the consequences of it, especially my sister.
it's mainly because of the massive six year age difference, but it's also because even though i have time, there's no time for her. it's really hard for me to be close with her.
sometimes i wish i was different, that i could be very affectionate, but i just can't.
this is how i am.
and as a result, my family and i fight ALL the time.
it's usually my inability to sort things out rationally with them..
sometimes, they just get on my nerves sooooo much.
sometimes, i get on their nerves.
sometimes, the fights are inevitable.

but no matter what is said or done.
we'll always be together.
because that's just how we do.

okay so most of the time, they want me dead. but hey, the love is always there.
we're strange, we're different. and that's never going to change.